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My 10 cardinal rules of life !!

Life is beautiful, we all make some choices … some of them work and some don’t. Sometimes we give up yet sometimes we want to give it one last try. Sometimes all we want to do is relax on a sunny beach and tell ourselves everything is fine when deep inside we know nothing is fine. Sometimes we wonder why life is so challenging & we are bored when there is no challenge. Sometimes we think we don’t get it yet other times we awaken and we get it. Sometimes we want to work out all day long and yet other times we just want to lay on our cozy sofa watching netflix.  Life is sometimes complex and yet if you can solve the puzzle .. everything makes perfect sense. While I moved through different experiences of my life. Here I am with full enthusiasm on my birthday saying happy birthday to my most favorite ‘myself’. Here you go:

1- Be who you really are:
The most important choice I always make is to be who I really want to be. Nothing in this world can stop you from achieving your dreams, from living the life you so badly want, from buying diamonds or having peace in your heart. It is your life, you are the owner, and most often than not we give this power to others. Everytime we give power to others we lose in front of ourselves. If all we can do is give ourselves one point for every single time we choose to be ourselves, we will be surprised. Most of us will even get numbers in the negative. If you don’t want to get married, don’t .. If you don’t want to have babies don’t, never let the outside factor, the culture, the traditions, the society, the people or etc dictate your life. Everytime we let something or someone outside of us dictate our lives, ‘we hurt ourselves’ ‘we disrespect ourselves’ and we never realize this. Because the most difficult is to ‘be you’. Your salvation will only be found by being ‘yourself’ in every single moment of life. If you can only allow yourself to be ‘who you really are’ trust me your life would be the best.

You may want to read my post on ‘Do you know who you really are?’ here

2- Live in the now ( Your past should stay there ..where it belongs, in the past):
When I was 27 years old … I realized I had hated myself for years, I thought the world was unfair, the world wasn’t a safe place etc …. But this was the first time of my life that I could not take this heaviness anymore, I have had enough .. I could no longer take it .. I made a decision to stop resisting, I told myself my past cannot control me. No matter how difficult or unpleasant it was, it has to stay there where it belongs, in the past. The past can no longer control, unless you allow it. The moment you stop resisting your past, the moment you stop beating yourself for things you had no control over or even for wrong choices & decisions you made … things change .. tables turn.. You may not have the best in the past but you can always have the best in the future, it’s just a matter of perception, and perception is nothing but just finding a new way to look at things in your life, just tell yourself a different story. Have new thoughts and free yourself from ‘yourself’. Allow yourself to breathe in peace .. Forgive, forget and move forward .. fly high and as fast as you can … where no trace of the unpleasant memories can make their way in your life. They may still show up, but they should not control you, they should stay where they belong, in the past.

Check my peace story of finding peace:

3- Your inner state is all that matters: (Happiness or sadness is not an outside matter):
It is so romantic to say someone makes you happy and so it is awful to say that some people make you sad. But no one .. no one in this world can make you happy or sad. It is just a matter of how responsible you are of yourself. Humanity has an interesting way to think, when you don’t like what you have created in your life like sadness you want someone to blame and if you don’t find anyone we say ‘the devil’ the devil makes me do things I never wanted to do or so … And so when good things happen we may want to give credit to our partners, family or God. We create these big stories in our mind, actually the illusions. So whatever we create someone outside of us has to be responsible for it and so we keep staying  dependent on the outside world either way. Where all we have to do is focus on our inner states. It is our inner state that creates our happy or sad experiences. Ever noticed .. how you behave when you are in love … no matter what may happen outside .. nothing triggers sadness in you .. why? Because your inner state is so high. Intrinsically it is our inner state that creates our outside experience not the other way. So next time you are unhappy, be courageous & tell yourself .. it’s you who is creating unhappiness.

You may want to read my post: ‘Are you happy yet?’ here

4- Do not let the illusions of life control you:
When we don’t want to face something we say .. give it sometime, whereby it is just a matter of seconds to change the thought that has been controlling us. But we limit ourselves by saying ‘I will never forgive him/her’ ‘I will never forget what he/she did to me’ etc , all based on our minds’ judgments making us live in our own bubble of illusions. Ever went beyond that .. How true is what you think is true? Did your lover really betray you? Is that the only truth? Is there a truth beyond the truth that you know? But I will tell you that the mind has no real answers. Although the mind is fantastic but it is very limited. You can never understand the complex problems, circumstances, situations, people etc through the mind. Like many people are being killed? Why rape? Cheat? Fraud? The answer is not in the mind. But ‘out of the mind’. Only then you will get the answer. You will understand that in reality there is not a single person against you, each one of them is acting perfectly given their model of the world. But the answer can only come if you remove the mind’s judgement, & the illusion that the mind has created. And this is where the soul comes in, the soul knows exactly what it is upto & we all are one in the grand scheme of things. We don’t realize when we hurt others, we hurt ourselves, and when we love others, we love ourselves. So when we look at everything with the eyes of love, be it ourselves, others, life situations the circle is complete. And life moves in circles and circles through you .. testing you and your capabilities through people, events, circumstances .. Illusions don’t help us .. they only make life more complicated.

5- Peace is inside you: (Come home and you will find peace):

Because there is no other place. There is only one home. There is only one God. Because there is no one else but ‘God’. No matter what you have I mean possessions and who you have I mean relationships .. you will never be at peace unless you come home, you come to God and then from there live a life hand in hand with God. And that’s the only way you can have a peaceful life. Peaceful life doesn’t mean no problems or challenges. No matter where you are you are never at home. Because coming home is only when you come to God. All problems stem from the same source, all problems are the same problems, and they are spiritual problems. The only way people will transform with the evolution of the world is to change their mindsets of ‘what they think about God’ of ‘what God is for them,’ of ‘The separateness man has caused between him/her and God’.

You may want to consider meditation: check my video here:


6- Failure is God’s way of saying ‘not this time or not for you’ but keep trying:
While we all think we fail in some shape or form. But the most courageous is the one who doesn’t let failure define them. For them the failure is God’s way of saying not the right time, try again later .. Or you are on the wrong path .. do something else … or some people just treat failure as feedback .. But they never give up .. they find new ways to deal with their failures. I have failed (according to my definition of success) immensely many times in my life be it relationships, love, work, but everytime I fail I pat myself on my back and say there is something better coming. (Well I will write my failure stories later) but trust me the fact that I am writing here today is also a result of something which I failed at and I learned a new way to look at it which will be a story to share later.

7- You can have it all, the universe has tremendous resources and possibilities that you will ever want:
It is funny there is a mindset where people say ‘you can’t have it all, either you have sickness, bad relationship or the worst job, you have to compromise on something’ and I was quite surprised when I heard it. Instead of this if we can change our thoughts to ‘We can have it all’ our world will be different. If we can say to ourselves ‘We are worthy, we can afford all luxuries, best relationships, perfect careers and the Porsche in the garage’. Think about it, how would you feel? Some people would even be uncomfortable when you mention this to them. Well! there are many more underlying beliefs and limitations we have about ourselves like some people think money is bad, money is a source of evil etc etc. Every time we find an excuse that we can’t have it all, we shape our own beliefs, long held thoughts become beliefs. As simple as that and we become a victim of our own beliefs. Check what beliefs restrict you. Change them & think of beliefs that expand you. It is not about money it’s about the mindset. There is nothing wrong in rich people or money but your judgment about them makes it so, because we all know all fingers are not the same even a child will know this

8- Dream, dream, dream & as big as you can:
I have often written about dreams in many of my posts. I can’t imagine my life without my dreams. My dreams are my biggest motivation, my best friends and my inspiration. And those who have dreams have everything. The good news is that dreams don’t cost a thing yet in less than a millisecond you can fully live that dream that you have.  Many writers have often written about this ..well not only writers many successful people talk about dreams. If you can’t picture what you like and desire, how can you have it? Well, that is the whole fun of life. Not knowing what you want and through that knowing what you truly want. New desires are born and once you get clarity, the picture is clear and the moment you can visualize that you can have it, without playing tricks with your mind.

9- Remember: Learn, reflect & implement:
Remember these 3 steps in this exact order. Acquired knowledge is useful but pointless if you don’t reflect upon it. I know so many people who have immense knowledge, which is only to have intellectual discussions. A knowledge that does not help you progress in your life is such a waste of knowledge, like a book lying in a library which no one reads. Do you see the point? You have knowledge but if you can’t reflect upon it you have wasted the knowledge. Say for example, you read a book by Louise Hay where she tells you about the root cause of a physical pain that you might have in your body. It is quite logical to reflect upon that and after that the next step is to ensure how you can save yourself from any future pain. This is when what you learn, you reflect & then you implement it in your life for good. The process starts from having the curiosity of learning but not leaving it there, reflecting and implementing but only if it serves you.

10- Bring your whole selves wherever you go: Align your heart, mind, body & soul:
When I was young in my teens actually even 20’s. I would ask a few questions from many people. Few of them were around death, fate, etc and why heart? And in the last few years the question has evolved. My question was why soul? I tell you this. Everytime you ask the question. God answers. Every single time. The problem is ‘we dont listen’. The next logical question is why we don’t listen? Because of the mental noise. There is so much noise, conditioning, rigidness of our beliefs that it will take generations and generations to unlearn the beliefs that don’t serve us. Say for example: Before people used to think that the earth is straight. It took decades to change that. Have you ever seen the teeth of herbivorous & carnivorous animals? Both of them have different sets of teeth. Now why is that, it is because they both eat different things. Now if you study the brain of animals, animals have brains btw but not as that of humans. So the point I am making is that God who creates everything perfectly and for a purpose .. ever wonder why we have been given with the body, the heart, the mind & the soul. And do you think that all this given to humans is to be on auto mode where everything will run on its own & you do not have to explore and use its functions for what it’s meant to be. Study yourself and understand this powerful being that ‘God’ has created… we can’t even imagine the tremendous potential, power & capabilities we have. And not only study .. use it for its intended purpose & only then you can create the grandest experiences of life having meaning, direction & purpose.

Wondering heart or the mind: check here:
Tips:

Love yourself, meditate and get answers to the following questions for yourself:

Embark on a spiritual path. If you are on one already ..than what is your relationship with God? How do you view God?

What is the purpose of your soul? What is the desire of your heart?

What is your legacy going to be?

I would also like to offer my free ebook here .. you can download it from my first page www.maleehabertin.com ‘101 + ways to transform your life’, You can also subscribe to my regular newsletter when you download it.

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Love,

Maleeha

#maleehabertin

#liferules #success #beyourself #personaldevelopment #meditation #loveyourself #innerpeace #motivation #inspiration